Fragile
by Azfixiation
Summary: Set seven years after the end of Nanoha A's. The kids are growing up and Fate faces some tough realizations about who she is. [shoujoai]


**A/N- **Okay, so this is set after A's. No idea who is going to end up with who in the end, but it's looking like Fate/Signum. Yes, I know it's weird, but I write weird couples. What can I say? Probably lots of out of character moments, but they aren't always going to be cute fluffy kids. As much as we love them, they're bound to change as they grow up... so deal with it. (I say that nicely.) I would put Fate at around sixteen in this. And the italics mean they are talking telepathically.

Thanks to Estrea for being my beta and not maiming me for this pairing

* * *

**Fragile**

By: Azfixiation

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"The match we put off... one day, I'll definitely settle it with you."

"Yes, fair and square. Many, many times."

-Final episode, Nanoha A's

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I'm exhausted. There is no denying it. Even years later I will not give into it, not against her. Not even if this is 'just for fun'. Our eyes lock and she grins at me, Laevatein's tip coming to rest under my chin. She thinks she has me and that has always been her weakness. I would think by now she would have learned that I won't stop until I can no longer stand.

"Bardiche," I say as I use my superior speed to jump away from Laevatein's blade before Signum can act. "Thunder Blade!" I call out once I am at a safe enough distance.

Quickly her shield goes up, blocking the attack easily enough with her Tank Spirit. When my attack ends she drops her shield and comes at me, Bardiche and Laevatein pushing hard against each other. Her face comes close to mine and she pushes harder.

_Alright kids, it's dinner time._

"Draw?" she asks, still pushing Bardiche and I to our limits.

"For now," I reply, thankful to Hayate for interrupting this time.

_We'll be there in five minutes._

"You've gotten better," she says as we head back to her shared home with Hayate and the other knights. She musses my hair the same as she did when I was younger. The way she always has since then. My cheeks still turn pink when she does it, mostly from the close proximity, so I turn away from her, using my speed to race her back for dinner.

Everyone was crammed into the small space, it being Hayate's turn to host our weekly get together. Between school and working for the Administration Bureau we had to have some time to enjoy being normal, or as close to it as the lot of us could ever get. But this has become sacred to me ever since being trapped in a dream world where I was forced to realize what and who really mattered to me.

Usually on these nights I stay with Nanoha, or vice-versa. This night is no different, and after walking the short distance to my house we settle into our comfortable routine. Mom was out doing a favor for Chrono, who hardly ever comes to visit anymore since his promotion a few years back.

"Hey, Nanoha," I start, looking down at her with her head on my lap. My fingers are running through her hair and she is already dozing off. It's weird, the relationship between us. The older we get the more I realize how intricate it is. "Do you think it's weird that we're like this?"

Her sleepy eyes look up at me in confusion before closing once more.

"You're my best friend. Aren't we supposed to be close?" she asks in return.

With that I let her sleep, staring aimlessly at the television as my thoughts get carried away again. I suppose it is different for Nanoha. Maybe if I didn't have such strange feelings lately it could be the same for me. I wiggle around on the couch to get comfortable, not wanting to disturb Nanoha, and try my best to clear my mind so that I too can sleep.

"Fate-chan," she says quietly. "You forget I can always tell when you're upset. Have I done something wrong?"

"I'm sorry for keeping you up," is my only reply. She doesn't push. It's one of the reasons we've been able to get so close. She knows when to and when not to force me into things. I wish more than anything that I could answer her. I want to tell her of all the things I've been feeling lately. That nothing she could do would ever be wrong and that I'm ruining everything because of my weird feelings. I'm becoming afraid of any physical contact with anyone.

_Are you awake?_

_Ungggg._

_I want my rematch._

_Ask your dog for a fight. It's too late for this Fate-chan._

_You're the only one who doesn't hold back. And forget I asked._

I slide off the couch without waking Nanoha, who thankfully sleeps like the dead once she manages to finally fall asleep. I should've known better than to try to get Signum out so late but I don't want to be alone with these thoughts and God only knows what Arf and Zafira are doing with their night off.

Determined to keep myself from thinking I get dressed and head to my favorite place to practice magic - the rooftops of several abandoned warehouses. There is no lighting within a half-mile distance so the sky is always prettier with the stars shining brighter in the darkness. "Bardiche."

"Yes, sir!"

"I wish you could tell me what to do," I say absently as I begin to practice my form.

"Tell you what to do about what?" Signum's voice cuts through my concentration as Laevatein swings down against Bardiche.

"You came?" I ask in surprise.

"Just because I'm grumpy doesn't mean I don't care," she says as she musses my hair again. I'm thankful for the darkness so that I don't have to worry about hiding my blush as she teases me.

"Did you come to fight or pick on me?" I ask finally, thrusting Bardiche towards her.

I hear her sigh as she lifts her hand and pushes Bardiche away from her. "I don't mind being your punching bag Fate-chan, but maybe you should try talking about this instead of getting so frustrated that fighting is all you can think of. You've been doing this for a month now."

"I don't have anything to talk about," I reply angrily, not happy with being backed into a corner.

"Then let's fight. If I win, you talk."

"If I win you stop trying to analyze me."

She doesn't waste time coming at me but I easily evade and get behind her, switching Bardiche to scythe form and slashing at her. Her shield raises in time to deflect it as Laevatein switches to bow form. She must be serious about this but I can't let her win. I can't let her know my secret. I won't let her hate me.

Fifteen minutes into the fight and I can feel the lack of sleep getting to me, leaving me unsure if determination alone is enough to win this time. _Talking is a lot less painful then this_, her voice says in my mind as I dodge her arrows.

_You wouldn't understand,_ I respond.

Again she deflects my attack easily in my fatigued state and lands a blow to my stomach, knocking me off balance. Laevatein comes down hard on my arm, causing me to lose my grip on Bardiche, and I know I've lost. Suddenly I feel her hands grabbing my wrists tightly as she pushes me down against the roof on my back, pinning me down.

"Talk," she says with a smirk at her victory.

"Let me up first," I complain and she quickly complies. I walk to the other side of the roof and sit down at the edge, letting my legs dangle off the side. I know she deserves to know the truth, especially since she's the one I've been running to in the middle of the night lately. "There's something wrong with me."

I hear her chuckle and clench my fists as I try to prepare myself for rejection. "What's wrong with my Fate-chan?" she asks teasingly as her arms wrap around me from behind.

"How can I talk to you when you don't ever take me seriously? I'm not a kid anymore Signum!" I try to struggle out of her embrace but she only pulls me away from the edge of the roof and closer to her.

"Yes you are. And just like Hayate you're stubborn as hell and can't let anyone take care of you no matter how hard we try! Do you think I would really come out here in the middle of the night if I didn't care about you?"

Giving in I let my body go limp against hers as she holds me up, trying to hold back the tears that threaten to fall. Even though Arf is my familiar and Nanoha is my best friend, it's been Signum all these years who has been secretly supporting me by taking all of my emotions and feelings in through our fights. "I can't. I'm sorry," I say before pushing off of her but she has more physical strength then I do and manages to hold me in place.

"Fate, look at me." I feel her hand on my cheek as she forces me to look up at her. "There is nothing wrong with you. I promise," she says and I brace myself for her to muss my hair again. For her to treat me like the kid I was seven years ago. But it never comes. Instead her head dips down and she kisses my cheek. "Go home before Nanoha wakes up and starts to worry about you."

Too shocked to say anything I nod and watch as she disappears into the sky. Putting my hand to my cheek with a smile spreading across my lips I quickly head home, more confused then I was than when I started. _Why did you?_ I can't help but ask her telepathically.

_Because I wanted to and it was as close as you'd ever get to admitting to how you're feeling. _

_Will Nanoha hate me for being this way?_

_Of course not. You need to have more faith in us all. Go sleep. We'll talk more tomorrow. _

I leave her alone then. Content, at least for now. When I get home I quietly change and climb back onto the couch with Nanoha and lay on the opposite side as her. She stirs as I try to force her into sharing the blankets with me and I can't help but ask. "You'll always be my friend, right Nanoha?"

The reply never comes but I think I finally know the answer on my own. Sleep begins to take over and I run my fingertips over my cheek as I remember Signum's kiss. If Signum can accept it surely my best friend will still love me even if I am a little... weird.


End file.
